Mud Honey

I have spent the better part of today trying to fill the order for the local restaurant. I am just about half way there. I will make the half way point later after I finish my coffee and my 15 minute break here on the computer.

If you do pottery and have spent any time on the wheel, you might understand that there is a certain place you have to be to throw.

Centered.

In this place inside yourself

with out tension

with out expectation

with out will

Some days you will sit there and know, today is not the day. Your thoughts are to scattered, your energy is off, what ever the case may be. So if you are wise, you walk away.

I have been busy with company, and more is arriving tonight. This new batch of company however is much easier, for you see it’s kids. My nephews and niece, who are self sufficient , low on expectations, full of fun. The only thing they have asked to do is a Marathon Monopoly game and maybe some Yatzee. The bathrooms do not have to be clean, because 4 of them are boys and there aim is only so-so.The house does not need to be white glove, It’s come as you are. So I have been in the mud room.

I have a slight head cold, so I wasn’t sure if I was going to be able to throw, but the house is quiet and mine, so I thought I would try.

When I looked up I had thrown for 3 hours and had 48 pieces done.

Today was a good day.

So, I thought I would share,

May your day be centered

My you be with out expectation

May you be in that place of peace that brings you home

and most of all may you know the creative spark

that is

LOVE .

Namaste

Wordless Wednesday

Christmas Party Deux

I was invited to another Christmas party, this time from a lovely woman I know. I deliberated over going , and decided that since it was just me alone, if it was awful I could escape rather quickly.

I had an errand to do first, so I left a little early.

The Lady I was meeting is a fascinating soul, and when you can get her to tell you her story, you will be enthralled for hours. I am never sure how some conversations start, but it always seems that the one you need to have,  evolve.

Have you ever had the same kind of person repeatedly appear in your life? Someone whose issues or problems are always the same sort? We were discussing how you draw these people to you. That they manifest themselves in your life because of some lesson that you haven’t learned yet, something she said ” you haven’t dealt with yet.” Considering the mood I have been in lately I turned that comment over , what if they are here because you have learned it, and have something to share? Something that will make a difference in their life? ( do you see what wonderful kernels of wisdom I picked up here in my blogosphere?) So then we laughed , of course, then you run into the whole which is it?

I need to share?

Or I need to learn?

Or of course my ever favorite………………Both. LOL

So when I left , I was pretty ‘up’ and in a good and introspective mood.

The party was in full swing by the time I got there. ( Did I mention I am always late? ~Grin~)

I wandered around not knowing anyone, when the hostess came up to me with another woman. ” Sorrow, you said you were interested in doing Yoga again, since you have moved here, Lynn is a Yoga instructor. ..” and she smiled and moved off to do her Hostess duties.

It turns out that yes, Lynn is an instructor, but not one for adults. We had a fantastic conversation , turns out that Lynn works with Autistic kids. She uses yoga in some of the most incredible ways. There are positions in Yoga ( and those of you that know which ones, please feel free to tell me) that release serotonin into the blood stream that helps to calm her kids. She was explaining that they teach these methods to help these kids decompress from over stimulation, and she has a 5th grader who has learned how to self-calm himself. Now how incredible is this? I have emailed a friend I have whose son has autism and told her to be on the look out for an email from Lynn with some books and other recommendations.

The next encounter was when a 2 year old  came screeching up to me and climbed me like a pole. Seems someone let the dog in and junior here was terrified of dogs. So we coaxed Fido out of the house and I had a best friend for life. We found Mum coming out of the ladies room. Seems it was Dads job to keep an eye on the fireball , but some sporting event on the big screen had held him captive. If you have had a kid, or been surrounded by pregnant women, you know what they look like. They have this , okay I am going to be corny here ,  “glow” about them. So I smiled and said ” when are you do?” she was shocked that I knew, seems she is 6 weeks along and in the throws of all that lovely morning (noon and night) sickness. Again, not sure how the conversation got there, but she and her sports addict spouse run a sustainable family farm and sell free ranging chickens and a host of other organic things during the season. How exciting! I have a place to go get free range eggs, hens and produce next summer! And a lovely soul who is considering a home birth!

The last one, which was a riot, came just as I was leaving. A very proper appearing woman came up to me and said ” Sorrow?”

I of course replied ” yes?”

“Do you do pottery?” she inquired.

” Yes, I do.”

“I have to tell you I bought a piece of your pottery at a local gift shop. I had to have it! It was the most lovely carved bowl I have ever seen, and the verse in it was enchanting!” she just went on and on. Needless to say my ego was the size of a mountain and I had a hard time fitting my head in the car. But how nice! How absolutely fabulous that my second Christmas party was so Joyfully pleasant!

….Of course you could say I brought these folks to me because I needed to have my faith in humanity re-affirmed…

~Chortle~

And while I have you chuckling, seems some one else who loves me, bought me a lovely Birthday Gift.

I thought I would share…

Meet Dexter, another puppy. I must have a sign on my back that says ” Needs mouths to feed, has to much love to give, Please give her a Puppy!”

I only hope that company can put up with the smell, cause house training is not going so well…

Corn flakes with Gin…

When the quiet finally descended in my home this morning, I took my coffee in the chill air down to the bottom steps. I sat there and stared off into the woods. I am a year older, what does that mean? I don’t feel any older, I still have the heart of that 16 year old who left home for new horizons, searching for self, for answers, seeking out those infinite possibilities.

I have sat and turned yesterday over in my hands, studied it like a pebble. For me, wisdom is always gained in retrospect. I have let go of other peoples dramas. I am never sure how I get caught in them, I think it’s the caring. It hurts to hear about 14 year old runaways, ambivalent fathers who put their terrified 11 &13 year old daughters on trains because they are to lazy to drive them home, struggling women whose crack addict ex-boyfriends robbed the house, some ones son who was in a car accident, and the stories go on and on. The drama that distracts people from living, the pain and anger that get manifested when life is so out of balance.

I am at a stage in my life where it hurts me, if I allow it, and I usually do, ( blame my marshmellow heart) but I have learned to put it down quickly and quietly. To re-find myself and my center. To move in and through those things that bring me no good. It has taken a long time to get here, and I don’t always do it right, but I am making the effort, and for me that is enough.

Surface Earth is a delightful soul whose poetry, posts, and commentaries always inspire and intrigue me. She can bring me a smile and she can take me into the dark corners of my being as well, that is the breadth of her gift. She posted a wonderful poem ” Love in the present tense ” and even let me print it and put it on my fridge!

and guess what Surface earth? I asked the 15 year old to fix my scanner! and he did!

TAHDA!

The Dr. Seuss room! When ever I have computer problems I need to remember to forgo the Tech support and go to the teenager!

I want to thank Miss Harleyquinn for her lovely birthday song, It was ever so sweet! and the bright spot today! I swear I will adopt that girl one day!

Speaking of adoptions ,

My lovely son gave me this for my birthday

This is Hildegard Von Biggun.

A rescue from the Humane society. She also likes my toes, but more to munch on than to say look nice!

Of course I laughed , just what I need , another mouth to feed. Judging by the size of the paws and the amount of food she puts away, I think I may have a small pony here.

Today she followed me around the house and chewed up every electrical cord she could find. (How do they do that and not get electrocuted? ) She also managed to chew a box and a pillow. ( good thing I shipped out the blue one!)

Lemmy the cat doesn’t think to much of her, he looks at me as if to say ” why does it smell like that?” and of course my old dog doesn’t care at all. She looks at me with an indifferent shrug as if to say, it’s always been a zoo around here, whats one more dummy?

So it’s late, and I am tired , the little one finished the milk and the teenager is whining because now he has nothing to eat his cornflakes with. I suggested Gin, but all I got was a face. Kids today, no sense of adventure.

Why when I was 15…

well I guess thats another story.

Walk easy

Be peace

Winter walk

I walked in the dark cold quiet.

I was emptying out from a difficult day.

A half moon watched my feeble attempts, it listened to my sobs

it shone upon the course of my tears.

I love cold winter nights.

When the trees stand like skeletons against the field of stars and the wind is an icy caress that chills my rage.

I am sorrow

that deep chasm that malice, apathy, pain, malevolence, hunger, need and avarice has carved into my soul.

It digs deep

I am hollowed out

waiting

waiting

for joy to fill me again.

Whaa-whoo-dorray

Thank you for sharing the gift of love with my children! For teaching them about their global family and how much fun giving can be!

For showing them how many folks are willing to accept love and take that love and pass it onward around the world.

I had a good laugh when the little one said ” Can we do this again next year? It was fun!!!” ( can you see me in my head going YESSSSSSS!?)

Here are a few photo’s from the fun

We would like to thank everyone who stopped by and encouraged us, who shared kind words and made us all smile, your presence and love were profoundly felt!

Thank you to our 5 recipients who need to let me know where to ship these to!

The Pillow ~ Missharleyquin

The stained glass~ Deb

The Framed lizard photo ~ Grace

The hand made soap and washcloth ~ Ron

The leaf wall hanging ~ Kate

Please email me at 11sorrow@gmail.com with an address and I will try and get these shipped on Monday.

Be peace and walk easy…

Poetry Friday

It’s Friday, and I have a poem sitting here I was going to type up,  After that is , I went and reread a favorite poem that I found here online. Do you know how many amazing poets are here at wordpress? There are a bunch! When I tag surfed poetry, I felt like a kid in a candy store!

So instead of me typing up this one, it will wait until next week ,and  today’s  poetry Friday  is a share from a very talented individual Qazse.

So go here and read Budku2 and enjoy!

Walk easy and Be PEACE

Soap Box

This is not a post for the faint of heart

This is not a post for the easily offended

I am climbing up on a soap box and I am  ranting, I am pounding my shoe on the podium and I am asking  “What? Why? How Come?”

If you have an answer share it, I don’t care what it is, I want to know!

Tonight I suffered.

I went to a Christmas dinner , I was moral support. I wondered why I was needed, but found out in the first five minutes.

You ever have a man have a conversation with your chest? I know my chest is big, alright it’s huge, but trust me, it doesn’t talk or do tricks, if you stare at my ninnies they don’t make faces.

I sat through dinner with a woman who talked about Jesus , mind you I was wearing a Star of David, but when she told me she prays every night that her sons don’t marry non Christian girls, I think my tongue started to bleed. When she asked me if Jesus was my lord and Savior, and I said  ” No “,  her expression was priceless. Thats an image that I will carry with me for the next month. She proceeded to tell me How I just had to invite Jesus into my life and how I would spend eternity burning in HELL if I didn’t find my lord and savior. It probably was a good thing she never let me say a word. It probably was a good thing that the acoustics where bad. It’s a Good thing that I don’t mind being called one of the Devils disciples, and it’s a really good thing I have a sense of humor.

What do you talk about with people who watch TV? The gentleman who  tried to strike up a conversation over really bad ice tea ( did I mention that the function was dry?) wanted to talk TV.

Do you watch this show? “no”

How about this one? ‘No’,

and when I tried to explain, I don’t have TV, have not had TV in 15 years, It was like I shouted ” I am a Leper!”

My favorite question, it’s a great one really, after they have sized you up, they hit you with the ” Do you Work?”

Someday I am going to come back with a really snappy response, something clever and not mean.

sigh, but until then I say “yes” and go through the “oh really? what do you do?”

Their reaction is always dependent on what I say, if I say ” I am an artist”, visions of nude pornography and heaven only knows what dance through their heads. Seriously, you can see it plain as day  on their face. If I say painter, potter, photographer, glass artist, mosaicest , sculptor, well trust me, thats a whole nother kettle of fish.

I don’t get people.

I really don’t.

I am a hermit for a reason. The reason is simple, I feel like a space alien. I do not understand this world.

Why do people do what they do?

Why do they talk about nonsense? TV shows as if they were real life?

Why do they judge you by what you wear? Who you know? Not by what you know and what you do?

How can they sit next to someone and assume that they are the same religion and then when they find out your not, make it their mission to convert you or crucify you?

Where are their manners? They talk with their mouths full of food, they don’t stand when  a woman stands, they eat with hats on ( which I LOATH) they don’t hold doors, they don’t look you in the eye when they speak to you, they pick their nose and their teeth at the table, no please pass, no thank you, no excuse me, no manners.

I don’t get people.

My kids and I had a blast making gifts, every day they ask me to read the comments and they add the names into the bowls. The feedback has been tremendous and has gone a long way towards reinforcing what I have been trying to impart to my kids, and I can not Thank you all enough!

And then..

There are 25 comments on this post, 5 of them are mine, only 9 of them were folks asking to put their name in the bowls, according to the view counter thing over 300 people have looked at this post in the past 3 days. So when the 15 year old asks me why more people aren’t playing, what do I say?  I told him I honestly don’t know. I think perhaps folks are daunted by the thought of paying it forward, that it’s easier for some folks to be in debt on a credit card than it is for them to be in debt to Life. Then the wise ass kid says ” but aren’t we in debt to life every day?”

YIKES.

I do not understand people ,

I don’t.

If you know Rodins ” The thinker”, picture me sitting on my soap box in just that posture.

Gifts with Love

~Grins~

Have I mentioned yet how much I love to laugh? How laughter to me is more sustaining than air? That I have a incredibly warped sense of humor and find some of the most inane things funny? No? Well I do!

Making 5 gifts in 10 days with my family was just about insane. The follies were many, so many that I doubt any of us will ever forget.

BUT

with out further adieu…

Our gifts to you…

#1 is from my 15 year old. You remember him, the crazy kid who was Santa for the humane society, who dealt with 100’s of people with out losing his cool or his groove, who yesterday whispers to me…” Mom, if nobody wants what I made, don’t tell me okay?” …he makes me remember all those deep moments of insecurity with profound gratitude that I am No longer in that place.

He hand dyed the fabric, pieced it together and then embroidered it. It is 14×14 inches and shades of blue..

I think he did a wonderful Job, but I am mom so my opinion counts more. ( just not to him)

#2 Is a collaboration between my daughter and I. She is itching to get into my glass. She has no fear what so ever of being cut, I think she just wants to figure out how to smash, mangle, cut and control glass to get it into the shapes she wants. That and it’s so pretty!

These were her two sketches she did…

It’s the light of heaven shining down on earth.

It’s the Solstice fire lit to bring light on the darkest day of the year.

We combined the two ideas into this:

It is roughly 15×13 including the frame! ( which T hand made), and will have 2 eye hooks to hang it in a window as soon as I get to the hardware store.

#3 Has a very funny story that goes with it. T hand made the frame , he also is the photographer of the collard lizard. I had matted the Photo and was waiting for the polyurethane to dry when the youngest sat on it and totally trashed the photo and matte. You will not be getting the ruined version.

It is a 5×7 photo matted up to a 8×10, the finished frame dimensions are 13×11 The frame is made of a rustic cedar.

#4 Was a simple and fun project, it is homemade soap and a homemade crocheted washcloth. The soap is made from olive oil, coconut oil, beeswax, sodium hydroxide and peppermint essential oil. This is a staple at my house since more than one of us can not handle the artificial ingredients in store bought soaps! The crocheted cloth is made from preshrunk 100% organic cotton, and even though it says preshrunk on the package, they always manage to shrink…go figure.

#5 The last and final gift is a piece of pottery made by yours truly. It is a wall hanging that is 11×8.5 leaf

the caption reads “Live with intention” .

These are 5 gifts made with love and laughter.

They are for YOU.

To restate, We have made these gifts for anyone who wants them. There is no charge. We will ship them any where in the world. ( so feel free to spread the word where ever) Our only request is that you pay this forward and do some good where ever you are . Please feel free to either leave a comment telling which one you would like or email me at  over the next few days. We will take all the names, put them in bowls for the corresponding number item and on Saturday December 15th we will draw names and I will contact you so that you can send me the address you would like the item shipped to.

I can not thank you enough for participating in this, it has been so much fun for all of us.

If you would please let as many folks as you can know about this so that they might participate it will make it even more fun for my kids! ( and me too!)
Blessings in Abundance to all

If you would like to read the back story please go here: X

Elf Union Blues

Well I know I said I was going to have up pictures of 5 gifts for you. I meant it when I said it, but the elves have different ideas. Seems there was the Santa gig at the Humane shelter, then the science project that was due today, the english essay, the meetings with the restaurant owner and scale issues. So I am running a bit behind. The kiln is at 400 degrees, and might be cool by 8 pm to unload. The 15 year old is stressed out that no one will “want his gift” (where does this insecurity come from? I swear it must be teenage angst.) So I may actually get them up by midnight tonight, does that count?

I am going to give it my best, but if they don’t get up today, it will be tomorrow . I keep repeating “it’s the thought that counts!” because my punctual little soul is cringing at being late. ( I should know when I include my kids in things, deadlines never work, not one of them was born when they were suppose to and it seems to be a life long trend. )

Good news However! I got the restaurant contract ! WHOO -HOO!

So come back in the morning! Pretty please!

This elf is going to get a latte and 2 aspirin and go right back to work!