I have decided that if the Olympics ever decides to have a falling with style competition, I am going to enter. I have potential to get the GOLD!
I was headed out to walk the dog last night, it’s wonderfully dark here at night. I took a step, then another …then I was air born, falling head first into the shrubs, over the deck, down the embankment coming to an ungraceful heap in a pile of wet leaves. I have a bump on my head, along with a gash. I have purple shins and I am not quite sure what I did to my elbow, but it bloody hurts like the bloomin Devil! So I am moving slow today.
The phone rang nonstop this morning, it was one of those days. I cradle the phone with infinite care as disembodied voices speak to me through sorrows tongue. I am the vessel of woe today, filling my being with other’s tragedies. I recognize the need, to speak and be heard, to have someone who cares out there just listening. This is no competition for whose life sucks the most, this is …..”please, please.. is there anyone out there???….can you hear me? can you make this lighter if only for a moment. I need to breathe….”
After the third call I put the answering machine on and turned the ringer off. I was full.
I left the bills, the errands , the work and the chores. I sat for a moment on the deck and debated. They are calling for rain tonight, sometime in the darkest part . The colors are just over peak and falling, with the coming rain, they will be gone soon.
I chose to walk.
I wandered the woods in search of solace, for a place to set down my bale of melancholy.
Perhaps I found a place, or it may be that just the exhale in the heart of my home was enough. I found that the weight had lifted, and though I was sore it was easier to be.
I do not know the mysteries of the universe, I can not see all ends. I prefer to laugh than to cry. I accept that to truly know joy, I have to allow sorrow to dwell with in me as well.
I am grateful to the powers that be, that I am in a good place, good enough that when sorrow comes to visit, I can serve her Tea and Scones. When she is done calling, I can wave her off with a smile and keep my peace and calm.
Shalom
Namaste
Salaam
Peace
To you and yours….
